Adult ADHD is more common than most people think. It’s not just a condition that impacts children, and if you’re in a relationship with someone who has ADHD, you probably understand that the symptoms can be challenging, at times. However, ADHD doesn’t have to define a person. It’s possible to have a strong, healthy, happy relationship with a partner who has this disorder. The biggest obstacle you’ll likely have to overcome is how to effectively communicate.
Thankfully, there are some tips you can put into practice to make the communication process easier for both of you. Let’s cover a few of them you can start using right away.
1. Educate Yourself
One of the best things you can do is educate yourself as much as possible on the effects of ADHD. Learn about the symptoms, the triggers, and what to expect from communication efforts.
By educating yourself, you’ll also have a better idea of how ADHD impacts your relationship. Otherwise, you might be easily frustrated by some of the symptoms. The more you understand them, the more you’ll realize that your partner isn’t causing communication issues on purpose.
2. Take a Look at Yourself
Sometimes, your own behavior can be more triggering for your partner’s ADHD than you realize. For example, if you’re easily frustrated and criticize your partner for their behaviors, you could end up making things worse.
Again, the more you educate yourself, the better. That means learning how ADHD affects your partner specifically and not just in general. Talk to them about their symptoms and what triggers them, and you’ll be able to do your part to limit those triggers in your relationship.
3. Step Into Your Partner’s Shoes
If you’re frustrated by the communication efforts in your relationship, consider how your partner might feel. It’s not uncommon for adults with ADHD to feel overwhelmed, ashamed, or even unloved. They might have trouble communicating. But, when they feel like they don’t have as much value in your relationship, they’ll tend to close themselves off even more. That can limit communication further and cause discord in your relationship.
4. Don’t Be Offended
At the end of the day, it’s important to remember that you and your partner are on the same page. You might be quick to judge or get frustrated by how they communicate. You might even experience hurt feelings if they forget certain things or feel overwhelmed by certain conversations.
However, the more offended you are within your conversations, the more likely those conversations will turn into arguments. Take the time to learn your partner’s communication style, so you’re less likely to be offended and frustrated.
5. Encourage and Acknowledge Progress
When you have a partner with ADHD, it’s easy to focus on the negative aspects of communication. Will it be difficult at times? Yes. Will it be frustrating? Probably. However, that doesn’t mean it will always be a challenge.
Again, think about how your partner feels regarding those communication challenges. You can help to improve their self-esteem and bolster their communication confidence. The more you encourage them, the more likely they will keep opening up and trying to improve. Focus on their intentions rather than what they might say. Encourage and celebrate them when they’re making good progress. Reward accomplishments. Helping them feel loved and appreciated will go a long way in your relationship.
These tips for better communication can improve the way you interact with your partner and boost your relationship entirely. Communication is a key component of success, and you can make it stronger than ever with your partner, despite their diagnosis.
If you need help communicating in your relationship, reach out to learn how I can help you.